Monday, February 2, 2009

Overdose of the Clear Blue Ain't So Easy

Ok I need to make this statement: The blog written below is not based solely on one person, it's based on a combination several different events. Nor is this a representation of the fullness of my thoughts or the complexities involved in this predicament. Not everything is based on people I actually know personally, but just this situation as a whole.


I'm tired of everyone getting pregnant. It's not you, it's the entire situation it creates. Being that I am a product of unwed parents I feel I am permitted to discuss this matter.

I do realize that those out there that get pregnant are in this predicament because of activities many of us are involved in. Can't seem to get away from, chains holding us down. It's a situation that is not ok, but at the same time doggin someone out doesn't "solve" anything. How do we address the situation and formulate solutions so there doesn't have to be a next one?

I hate that many people are pregnant or end up having children when the ducks aren't in a row. I only dislike this fact because I would think everyone wants to have an "ideal" family and this whole out of wed-lock pregnancy thing turns things around. There is so much emotion that is involved with the birth of the child that there is no way to cope without God. People tend to run from God at times because those who have proclaimed to be His sheep are running around with Black paint booting people out while their wool is gray after intense scrubbing. Leaving them to the wolves instead of taking them to the Shepherd to be counseled.

I'm angry because these children and their parents are our future, and their lifestyles are being cramped. We're still living lives where we sweep behind our footsteps so our children won't follow, not realizing that we aren't worthy to sweep. We keep our mouth's shut while our friends end up in the same situations and instead of speaking what life we do have and giving it to them plain, we offer a distorted reality. We're still runnin, from what we don't know. We're steady trying to listen to ourselves and not God. Speaking our words and not His. Never clearing our ears because the Q-tips have yet to be refilled. We attempt to refill with OE, on E, never hittin up that real deal Petroleum.

The world has nothing for us to guide us, at times we feel all alone and even when we do try to do everything right, 1 night and 1 love can become 1 life. Married life ain't everything because who's to say pre-pregnancy marriages are any better than post-pregnancy? Broken relationships whether knotted or frayed create an environment where the children are exposed to relationships that should not be a model for them to follow after. We continue to try to sweep up behind our footsteps with no dustpan. Regardless of being married or not, an unhealthy relationship is breeding ground for so much depression in the life of a child. Grant it nobody is perfect, but why not model ourselves after One who is.

1+1+1=1 is the best way for a child to be raised, but sometimes it doesn't add up this way.

I am upset at those that want to judge these people who are getting pregnant, because many of us are partaking the same fruits. We get upset or feel better because we decided to have a few abortions instead of allowing the seed to do as God wants it to. We took their life into our hands, in the same manner in which we grasp our own, and now we want to fault someone else for granting life it's freedom. Apparently the fingers can be pointed when what's done in the dark still lurks in the shadows lost like our souls, suffering from the obesity of our continued ignorance. Even if we haven't seen the + we've been introduced to it's predecessor and know it all too well. And somehow we continue to file exempt because our plus remains a minus, either by our hands or God's. Tagging someone's belly to this act like Facebook, not realizing that we're standing right next to them with our Pro-Choice sponsored by Trojan T-shirt on...


I say all this because I weep for our young people as they are coming up today. Their perception of this world is so skewed. How do we tell a 16 yr old not to go out there and have sex because they'll get and STD, AIDS or pregnant when they've seen it all over the place and are a product of an out of this fiasco? When we aren't talking about it and we act like things are peachy keen. How do we talk to our young people about what is going on in the world today?

Once we've made the decision, did the do, when it's all said and done. What are the solutions? Where does this fatherless mother go when she's all torn up inside because of the mister that's missing from her bosom? When she feels she can't express her feelings of hurt or anguish to the public at large because she'll be tagged as a bad mother. Where does the young father go when he still wants to add sugar to this lemonade from lemons, when the mother is still dealing with heartbreak and uses the child as a pawn?


What are the ingredients that produce this situation? How can we support those emotionally that are currently dealing with it? How do we solve it in our community?

{if you don't have gmail, you can comment under anonymous, just leave your name please}

Monday, January 26, 2009

What's that bumpin in the back?

Ok so this was my morning text today...

"What's playing with the bass pumpin? With various aspects of life groovin to the beat, is it to God's rhythm? First we must turn down our volume. Seek. Matthew 6:33"

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

It was demanded to blog something [Steven] about this thought so I shall.

Origin:
This thought came from the fact that I had both the radio in the living room and the radio in my room on. Both were on the same station and at one point my alarm started going off turning off the radio in my room. During this time I could only hear the station in the living room.

I thought about the fact that while my radio was on in my room I could really in essence only hear my station or a partially amplified version, but I didn't discern the other radio's tunes.

Thoughts:
Like all radio stations we have to "seek". There are times when we are told about a good station or what not, but at some point we have to put in the coordinates.

Similar to when my radio in the room was off... there are times when you may not know exactly how to turn the radio on in particular rooms (i.e. lovelife, school, friendships, work, depression, etc). At those times sometimes just turning the radio off helps. That way you can hear what's playing in the main room of your heart. Hopefully that's God. Sometimes it's not. There are times when we depend on ourselves to not only live our lives, but to DJ at the radio station too. So we're living life and advising the same life... A life that we know nothing about. A life that we haven't lived or seen before and can't see past the next second, let alone where we're going to be in the next five years.

You know how when you call a radio station you have to turn your radio down so that they don't clash?? (lol... wow) This is so our lives. Whether we're listening to HVN 77.7 or our own FLSH 98.6 it's important for us to turn it down when we're calling in. They'll be feedback on both lines and neither of us will be able to hear. On one hand we're calling in with our positions at church before us, filling the air essentially with booti-chatter. We aren't coming humbly to Him and attempting to listen. We're calling and all He hears is stagnant... I mean static :) On the other hand we're calling and all we hear is us. We act as if we've called the request line and just have a list of songs we want on the countdown at 7.

I thought about how this happens in our spiritual life. Being one that is IN LOVE with music I feel our spiritual lives are somewhat represented by what we have on our ipods. What exactly do we "blast" in our lives? What are people hearing without us saying a word?


hmm... personally I think of how my music changes at different times. There are times when I listen to strictly gospel, other times when there's a mix. If my packaging had the ingredients of my life it would vary.

At times it looks like this...
Ingredients: Jesus, devotion, prayer, Kiki Sheard, Kirk Franklin, conversation with God, Cece Winans, Daryl Coley, "Cool" by Anthony Hamilton, "Respect" by Kendra Foster, inadvertant gossip, and various types of idleness (i.e. Bad Girls Club, House Hunters, Property Virgins, Color Splash, flipping channels, Wii).

Then there are times when it looks like this...
Ingredients: Half-Prayer, The Foreign Exhchange, conversation with God, Jill Scott, Anthony Hamilton, John Legend, "War" by Kiki Sheard, "Look Up" Tye Tribbet, attempted devotion.

I know that my midset depends on which ingredients I'm working with or which station is tuned louder. Which station is in all the different rooms of my life... To be honest there's one room that He's in and out of and it's the last place I need Him to reign.

This blog is essentially why I created this blogspot. I want us to check our ingredients a bit, see what we're working with. You frost a cake with gravy and you can't baste a turkey with frosting.

What would you like to add to the stew?

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

So I decided to write a letter to my unborn, un-conceived child.


Dearest [Angel],

Yesterday history took place and I'm so glad it did. See that President that we have/had was the very first Black President in America and it was a super big deal. Mommy didn't go to the inauguration and that is the one thing that makes her sad to this day. One thing that I want to share with you is that you should ALWAYS take risks and follow your heart. There are going to be many things in life that seem to have logical answers, but sometimes the answers are not actually logical. Feed your imagination. Mommy and Daddy have been inspired by the President and First Lady and that is why we plan to give you the best life we (through God) can offer you.

When I first heard that President Obama was going to run for president I was excited and I near about held my breath waiting for him to announce what he was going to do. Even then I didn't quite see ALL THIS, but I was very excited that a man of such character would run for President of the United States of America and try to beat the odds. Moral: always live life like you would run for President & step out on faith.

The campaign trail was interesting. People were split between him and other candidates for the democratic nomination like Hilary Clinton (former first lady). He ran a VERY CLEAN campaign and held his head up with pride. They found NO DIRT. The most they could pull out is that he smokes. Now that is a small thing... but I don't want you to ever smoke because that is a habit that even a man that wonderful has a hard time breaking. Plus it's nasty and the boys won't want to kiss you. I had a wager with our Pastor that he would win the nomination to represent the democratic party. The winnings were to go to the building fund... well... I won! And a piece of that front pew is due to our little wager. ;) Moral: always stand behind what you believe and sometimes you can get something out of it ;P

He remained steadfast and many people were behind him. Although in Alabama there wasn't a lot of Obamanation going on, back in my homestate of Oregon there was a lot of hoopla! All different races and everything. This is the type of dignity I want you to have. Always treat people with respect and never say never. Believe in your dreams and with God you can catch them all!! I voted for him on November 4th even though I knew Alabama was going to be a state that voted for his opponent. They did. President Obama didn't win Alabama, but he won SO MANY other states and he became "President Elect". Moral: always vote for who you believe is best even if you think the majority will go against you

As I said before, one thing I am so sorry that I didn't do is go to the inauguration. I tried to think so much about it and rationalize it. From well before President Obama was nominated I planned to go and was waiting for tickets. When I emailed my senator he informed me there were no more tickets and I didn't understand that there were going to be different events taking place. Your auntie Tanesha was very sure and purchased her tickets even two weeks before he was elected... I wish I had done the same. I thought that the cost of the trip to not actually see the President was not going to be worthwhile, but I was wrong. I didn't think about the people that would be there and the fact that I would have such an amazing experience to share with you. I didn't realize that the campaign was about the people, so in essence THE PEOPLE were the reason I should have gone. I have many friends that have stories to tell so I will let them share stories with you below and you can see what it was like through there eyes...

[share your story below]

I love you so much,
Mom